Hello sir, I am a very experienced AB player.
Your ultimate aim for weapon is the Glorious Cure Wand, but I do suggest you get a recovery light and then move onto the one handed thanatos staff in the longrun whilst saving up kvm badges for the GCW, then when you got the gcw upgraded it will outtrump most other staves and become the main stave you use.
As Joao has suggested it is better to get the Dex Temp boots for the 0.5 second fixed cast reduction. What we as AB's have to realize by the late levels is that variable cast times mean nothing, what really cripples your supportability is the fixed cast times we have, nearly every skill in our tree has a portion of fixed cast time that is long. There are no need to look towards temp vit or int boots, those are essentially useless to you in end gameplay where cast speed means everything. If anything, aim to obtain a Sleipnir, it is the ultimate boot you can wear and ties together in place with Dex Temp.
For party general mobbing grindfest healing, i suggest the chibi pope hat and a blush[1] combo, this nearly outtrumps any other top/mid gear combination save for the ygg crown, which is only to increase heals to yourself. End game you would want to hunt 2 white lady cards for the blush and pope hat. For every other situation, you pretty much follow other headgear suggestions.
Shadow gears are really up to you, but to be honest, you could really use a spellflow shadow set so you free up an accessory slot from the phen clip. And most importantly get a healing weapon shadow gear, this is the only real shadow gear absolutely necessary for a support healer.