I live in the ocean because aquariums = oceans. Vilbort is drowning and I'm holding my breath just to show him I can freely breathe whenever I want.
Vilbort (Vilbort is a good butler because he does what he is told. I ordered him to stay put about seven months ago and he is still there. Sometimes I make him stand on one leg and push him over repeatedly. I've broken his spirit to the point where he is no longer a person.)